There are lots of pressures in a family business, and always more work to be done. What drives the work of family members in the business is usually defined by what needs to get done. As the business grows, what you took on because it needed to be done has to mature into roles that actually fit the unique skills and talents of the individual family member.
Jim Collins, in Good to Great, talks about two phases of building out the team in a business. The first stop is getting the right people on the bus, and the second involves getting them in the right seat. In many family businesses, you're on the bus, because you're part of the family. But how do you get the right people in the right seat? If roles aren't developed beyond the "must do" category, your family business will probably live out the statistic that only 30-40% of family businesses make it to the second generation and only 13% make it to the third.
In many family businesses, you're on the bus because you're part of the family, but how do you get in the right seat?
In many family business strategy meetings, I've had owners bring their children to the meeting. Sometimes, it's obvious that the second generation is deeply invested in where the business is headed, and other times, they remain completely silent and display body language that to most onlookers seems like serious disinterest.
What's underneath those realities are sons and daughters who are stuck in roles that aren't a good fit, making them feel incompetent and frustrated, or family dynamics that are guaranteed to send the second generation packing sometime soon. When this happens the second generation remains unappreciated, their talents and ideas discounted, or in other instances, the owner has continued to fulfill roles that they aren't very well suited for, creating resentment and yes, more frustration.
For me, this truth is personal. As a co-owner of a business with my youngest daughter, I've made all of those mistakes myself. I've kept roles for which I am not suited, and discounted her contributions and insights. Because of what I am sharing in this article, that's changed in our business. Both our relationship and the business are much stronger as a result.
Right Seat Means Asking "How are You Wired?"
It all comes down to getting people in the right seat on the bus, and that has to be based upon more than what needs to be done; it needs to fit how that family member is best suited to contribute. If we want thriving businesses that create a legacy, our question needs to be "how are you wired to work, lead, and contribute?"
When we ask about how someone is wired it implies that there is something about their personality, their communication, and leadership style that is baked in - it's part of how they were made. In our experience, and according to the Bible, people are uniquely crafted with gifts and talents. We are each created in a unique way. While the unique shape found in each person is influenced by our life experience and family upbringing, there is a firmware (if you're techy), or a chassis (if you're a car person) that is actually part of our permanent wiring (that's a construction metaphor).
Regardless of which metaphor you relate to, both family businesses that want to live out values from the Bible, and those that want to work in ways that make people more human, find that honoring each individual's unique wiring or gifting is how we get people in the right seats on the bus and unlock their best contribution to the business and the family.
Right Seats and Best Team = Unlocking Your Gifts
The Bible clearly explains this wiring by identifying this unique wiring as a "gift" or a "grace." Each person is graced with unique gifts. Three big things happen when we begin to understand and lean into those gifts. First, we gain new clarity and confidence in the best way that we can contribute and lead others. We understand the way that we are built to communicate and see the world so that our relationships and perspective can be delivered with both confidence and humility. Humility because we recognize that others in the business have a unique wiring, too, and that we're growing into our own gifts. Second, family interactions and team leadership become much stronger as we become aware of the gifts of others and appreciate them in new ways. Third, personal leadership development and growth emerge as we walk down the path to living out those unique, God-given gifts. As we lean in to those gifts, we mature in our leadership, and our impact on others grows.
This approach is called "strengths-based," but when we comes from a Biblical perspective, it rises above simply comparing ourselves to others as their guidestar for growth. In the Biblical view of gifts, we step beyond simply using personality tests that compare us with other humans, because we lock in on the ultimate source of human flourishing - our creative design, and the perfect human who modelled these gifts- Jesus.
Brand Disciples helps family businesses discover and unlock how their unique gifts improve teamwork, personal leadership, and create legacy and impact.
